Hope you all had a Merry Christmas...and a not-too-disappointing end to the NFL season. I thought you'd all be proud to know that this weekend my fantasy football team, the Hemorrhoids, pulled off an upset to win the Championship...with a final record of 11-6. Not too shabby. Anyway, it was a shining moment for me to conquer a league composed mostly of football-worshipping males.

On a sadder note, the Steelers finished 6-10. Disappointing to say the least. But at least I was able to cheer them on to victory at their last home game...from Lynn Swann's seats! How sweet is that!

The afternoon was a total blast...and thanks for the tickets, Swanny!

I guess the city of Butler has had enough of my rebellion. They're doubling the fees at the meters. So I'm gonna show them. From now on I'm walking to work.

On a different note, all the holiday cookies and candy around the office are killing me. Good thing I'm walking to work.

Monday's can be rough. And I was in rough shape today. I was a stuttering, bumbling idiot today. Not good when you've got a lot of phone calls to make. At one point, after I prefaced a question with about 15 run-on sentences, one of the people I was talking to actually said, "Come on, Sara. Just spit it out."

We've all seen those restroom germophobes that turn off the faucet with a paper towel and then use it to open the door to exit the restroom. But at my office I've uncovered a new specimen this week. I was walking right behind this woman on the way to the restroom. When we got to the door she stopped and kind of bent over. It took me a second to realize what she was doing: she was pulling down her sleeve and using it to grasp the door handle and pull it open. Once inside the restroom she got a paper towel and used it to close the stall door behind her. I felt bad, but I couldn't help but stare. I mean, fine, if you want to be ultra sensitive after you've washed your hands with anti-bacterial soap, but why go to all the trouble to avoid germs when in 30 seconds you're going to be wiping your butt? If I see that lady in the restroom again, maybe I'll have to wait and wash my hands in the kitchen. Seeing the look on her face as I walk out of the restroom without washing my hands would be priceless.

I'm such a rebel.

I've always wanted an exotic pet. Like a llama. Or a moose. Moose are awesome. They just look cool with the huge nose, antlers, gangly legs, and the furry chin hangy thing. You gotta love the furry chin hangy thing. I've also thought I'd like to have a pet bear. Especially in the winter months. Wouldn't it be great to curl up with a great big grizzly bear when it's -10 degrees out? And no, dating a big hairy guy is NOT the same thing...

Ah. I'm free to publish again. Blogger was acting up yesterday and I was unable to post anything. Unfortunately, now that I'm finally able to post, I can think of nothing to say.

I'm discovering that cashews don't make a very satisfying dinner.

My brain is only good for about 9 hours of quality thinking. Then it just gives out and I'm left a complete zombie. This is the state I am in right now. It's quite frustrating because I've got a lot to do, but my mind just refuses to cooperate. A mind is really something that you want cooperating with you, more than anything else. Except maybe one's bowels. You don't really want them working against you either.

My Combos (R) bag claims that Combos are "The Cheese Filled Snack of NASCAR (R)". I wonder how many products they had to battle out to get that title. I can't think of many other cheese-filled snacks. In fact, I can't think of any. It's kind of like calling myself the #1 blond-haired female mechanical engineer in Butler. I'm still waiting for my crown to come in the mail...

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Okay. I'm back. I hope. I know, it's been a long time and I've probably alienated all those who once enjoyed My Back Pages regularly. All I can do is say "I'm sorry" and do my best to revive the blog and try to bring it back to the glorious state it was once in.

Now that my marathon travel schedule has slacked off and I'm back from a delightful European vacation, I'm hoping to have more time to dedicate entertaining the online masses with my charming anecdotes and witty repartee. All right, all right. So maybe boring a few loyal family and friends is more like it, but a girl can dream, can't she?

But anywho, just want to tell the one person who still checks the blog that I'm here for you. I am resuming my quest to amuse you, Unnamed Person, by relating oft mundane but occasionally interesting details of my life and my sporadically enlightening musings.

Cheers!