I miss blogging. It's something I truly enjoy. There's nothing like piecing together some thoughts and flinging them out there like panties at Rod Stewart concert, not knowing whose head they will land on.


Unfortunately I face several obstacles to my blogging career, not the least of which is material. It may just be insecurity or a lack of proper perspective, but I struggle to find as many interesting things to blog about as in those early years when I had tales of BYOB bowling alleys to tell or concerts to recap just about every other day, it seemed. Now I'm sure some of this is perception. I still have crazy experiences and unusual encounters with people as I always did, but they somehow seem less fantastic as they pile up in that ever more crowded closet of life experiences and fade from my consciousness much more quickly than they used to. As my life is filled with more and more responsibilities, my mind has less and less time to dwell on the light-hearted and the absurd. A depressing thought, I know, but a reality nonetheless.

I sometimes consider writing about what I am thinking about these days, work stuff and more personal concerns. But let's face it, engineering talk often isn't particularly interesting to most people PLUS it's usually a risky career move to go blabbing about clients or colleagues online, no matter how broad the terms are or how you try to mask identities.

Then there's the personal stuff. Again there's a risk to putting unresolved concerns or uncensored feelings out there on there in cyberspace, not knowing who will find them and misconstrue them. I've always had this concern/neurosis about things that I'm working on, that I hate for people to see them before they're fully realized. It's like tasting a cake pulled out of the oven 15 minutes early. You can't fairly assess it's quality or the proficiency of the baker based on the specimen because it's not done yet. So whether it's design work for my job, or just vocalizing my thoughts, I struggle to permit myself to reveal them before they're fully formed. Yes, I am a bit of a perfectionist and want people to see the best I've got to offer, but also my thoughts are often rather abstract and often people don't understand or misinterpret them if I reveal them before I have the chance to develop and manipulate them into shape people can comprehend.

But of course, time is the biggest hinderance to blogging. Take this post, for example. I started it while working late last night as I waited for a particularly large 3-D design file to load on my computer. I got a couple of paragraphs in and then told myself I'd finish it at home before I went to bed. But by the time I went running, talked to Grandma, went to the grocery store, fixed dinner, cleaned up the kitchen, and showered, it was 10:45, well past bedtime. So I added another paragraph during lunch break and am writing a little more while I wait for some drawings to print (at the office late again).

Only time will tell whether this post is actually completed and published. I have a huge folder of aborted posts I have started over the past few years, but have been unable to finish before the idea expired as I feel this one is already beginning to.

So now what? Should I keep trying? I have a feeling I will fail far more than I succeed which will be extremely frustrated. So is it still worth it?

For now, I'm going to say "yes"...